π Stage 2 β Recognising feelings π
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What am I feeling? Why do I feel this way?
Feelings accompany us every day.
They arise in encounters with people, in situations, in thoughts and memories.
Sometimes feelings are clear and distinct: joy, fear, anger or sadness.
Often, however, they are mixed or difficult to name. Then we only feel that βsomething is inside usβ without knowing exactly what it is.
Social competence also means perceiving and understanding your own feelings.
This is because feelings influence our behaviour, our decisions and our relationships with other people.
Those who recognise their feelings can act more consciously.
Those who do not recognise their feelings often react unconsciously.
This level therefore invites you to perceive your feelings more accurately:
What am I feeling right now
When do these feelings arise
Why do they arise?
It is not about evaluating or changing feelings.
It is about perceiving and understanding them.
Exercise: My feelings in everyday life
Take time to observe yourself in your everyday life.
1) What feelings do I experience?
Throughout the day, consciously pay attention to the feelings that arise within you.
For example:
Joy
Calm
Uncertainty
Anger
Sadness
Curiosity
Contentment
Tension
Write down three feelings that you have experienced.
2. In which situations do they arise?
Think of a specific situation in which this feeling arose.
For example:
Conversation with someone
Work or school
Being alone
Conflict
Sense of achievement
Memory
Encounter
Write down a situation for each feeling.
3) Why does this feeling arise?
Try to understand what might be behind the feeling.
For example:
I felt anger because I didn’t feel understood.
I felt joy because I received recognition.
I felt uncertainty because something was new to me.
There is no right or wrong here.
It’s all about your own perception.
Important for your learning
When it comes to feelings, it also works best if you take your time.
On one day, focus on observing your feelings.
On another day, observe the situations.
On another day, observe possible reasons.
For example
Day 1 β What feelings do I have?
Day 2 β When do they arise?
Day 3 β Why do they arise?
Between these steps, your inner self continues to work. You begin to recognise patterns: certain feelings in certain situations.
Here, too, it helps to find an inner image or memory for each feeling. Feelings are strongly linked to experiences.
When you remember a specific situation, your understanding deepens.
Example of a 3-day exercise
Three exercises of 3 days each makes a total of 9 days. Always take your time. Your subconscious needs this.
Example: Feelings
Day 1 β Feeling: Joy
Today I felt joy when I spoke to someone I know well.
Day 2 β Feeling: Anger
Today I felt anger when I felt misunderstood in a conversation.
Day 3 β Feeling: Insecurity
Today I felt insecurity when I had to do something new.
Example: Situations
Day 1 β Situation: Conversation
I felt joy during a conversation with someone who is important to me.
Day 2 β Situation: Misunderstanding
I felt anger in a situation where someone misunderstood me.
Day 3 β Situation: New task
I felt uncertainty when faced with a new task.
Example: Reasons
Day 1 β Reason: Connection
I felt joy because I felt connected and accepted.
Day 2 β Reason: Not understood
I felt anger because I felt like I wasn’t being heard.
Day 3 β Reason: Unknown
I felt uncertainty because the situation was new and unfamiliar to me.
Reflection
Review your observations.
Are there any feelings that occur frequently?
Are there any situations that trigger certain feelings?
Are there any reasons that recur?
These insights will help you to become more self-aware.
Learning together (recommended)
This exercise can also be very helpful in groups.
Each person describes:
a feeling
a situation
a possible reason
The group listens without judging.
It often becomes apparent that many people experience similar feelings.
This strengthens understanding and mutual acceptance.
The aim of this stage
You begin to consciously perceive your feelings.
You recognise the situations in which they arise.
You begin to understand the connections between feelings and experiences.
This forms the basis for consciously controlling your feelings later on.
When you are ready, proceed to:
Step 3 β Controlling your emotions
How can I remain calm? How can I respond consciously?